Timeline of a Relationship

1362724811_shutterstock_12893383

first he will give with no thought of reciprocity
he will shower you with gifts in endless generosity

but then he begins to expect something in return
and your questions receive a reply almost stern

I sent a text last night and figured I’d hear from you this morning
When it used to be 10 texts without precipitated cause or warning

the daily good mornings and good nights become less and less frequent
the excuses to see you become excuses of what he had meant

the willingness to drive for miles even to spend a few minutes together
turn into justifications due to work or traffic or the god damn weather

when social media becomes the first stop upon waking
when the giving is slowly replaced by the taking

when at first you were all he ever needed and wanted
over time he begins to take you for granted

when every other woman was invisible, all he saw was your eyes
now his eyes begin to wander, and you’re placated with lies

she’s just a friend.. don’t you trust me?.. I only want you”  turns to
I don’t need this.. maybe you should do whats best for you

this is the timeline of a relationship as it dies a slow death
and that final moment comes before you’ve even taken a breath

you grieve, and you cry and you tell yourself never again
never will you give your heart and endure so much pain

until one day another’s sweet song seduces you
he’ll tell you he’s different and his words will ring true

and he will give with no thought of reciprocity
he will shower you with gifts in endless generosity

but then…

Advertisements

Living Proof

2b193f051640a0fce35da3d62ae16842

Time and time again
life will prove to you how fragile and rare is Trust,
and how valuable when found.

It will prove to you
that many people will disappoint you
and hurt you;
and how important it is to hold on to those that don’t;
how important it is to hold on
to those who can taste your tears through the kisses,
and then kiss them away.

It will reveal to you
that there is nowhere to go to escape from heartache,
that it will hurt deeper and stronger each time;
even though, each time,
you thought you had mastered the pain.
But pain is not meant to be mastered
— it is meant to conquer ‘you’,
— it is meant to reveal you.

Life will manifest to you
that heartbreak is a lesson we must learn,
and that its only teachers are those we have loved.

It will show you
that sometimes
it takes a smack in the face with a boulder
to finally see things as they truly are;
and we realize we can lie to ourselves for only so long.

Life will prove to you
that sadness is only one of two wings;
and that we need both wings to fly.

That at the end,
and in the end,
there is only God and you…

…and that is sufficient.

2b193f051640a0fce35da3d62ae16842

Verbal Death

death

Does he not realize
That he dies in front of my eyes
Every time he lies..?

He may as well wield a knife
And take his own life

For it is not the sword
But the deceitful word

That cuts the jugular and the femoral
in preparation for his funeral..

It is a permanent stain
His apology is in vain

For there is no return from verbal death
After he’s uttered his last lying breath.

First Love

“I used to build dreams about you”
~F.Scott Fitzgerald
first love 2

 

There is always something special and unforgettable
about that first time we fell in love –
something that remains deep within us
as we journey on through our lives;
something we never let go of.
If you ever had the occasion to re-meet a past, first love –
you will most likely be hit with the realization that
not only is he/she a different person,
but that you are also a very different person
in relation to them.

Because it is not the ‘person’ we remember necessarily;
but the feeling we had,
the loving fully and being loved in return,
the innocence of first love when betrayal never entered our thoughts,
the utter belief that we were in total control of our destiny..
the KNOWING that we were going to be happy for the rest of our lives,
and the faith that love could conquer all.
We felt everything more acutely,
our joys and our sorrows,
because we didn’t have anything to compare them to.
Everything was a first.

But Life teaches us otherwise.

And despite all of life’s trials,
and all of love’s lessons,
those old memories remain.
They are reminders of a simpler, happier time
when we held the world in our hands
and hopeful innocence in our hearts.
It carries with it a subtle lingering sadness..
because we know it is something
we can never get back…

… despite our efforts as we keep trying.
first love 3

then love will find you.. (a collaboration)

When you go out seeking love,
you find broken people seeking love.

But when you go out seeking Life,
you become ‘whole’ and encounter ‘whole’ people living life…

… then Love will find you.

‘Seeking love is like chasing the setting sun around the earth,
pleading for it to rise again.

Be still, orbit yourself,
and you become the east and the west…

… then Love becomes your Axis.’

~ Skyblueandblack and Skip Maselli (phosphorimental)

Image